Is it Christmas yet?

I don't enjoy the Christmas holidays or anything about that time of year. Thanksgiving falls in late November, my birthday happens to be on December 3, and, of course, Christmas is on December 25. I'm not an adherent of any organized religion, but I do have my own spiritual beliefs. Honestly, I don't even know what Christmas is supposed to commemorate. Generally I stay pretty drunk throughout the last two months of each year. At the moment I do not even recall what I did on Christmas 2007. This blog might provide a clue if I bother to reread my entries from last December.

People I know, and others whom I have encountered, speak of Christmas in glowing terms and love to talk about their plans for the holidays. I do not begrudge them that, not even in my most petty of moments. They speak of the joy of opening presents under a tree during their childhood and talk about planning Christmas surprises for their children, their nieces and nephews, or whomever. It must feel good to look forward to that time of year and have enough of a connection to others that you want to create enduring memories with them that will last a lifetime. I don't get it. Maybe someday I will. A sound just made me turn my head. It's Larry the cat scratching around in his litterbox. Is he expressing an opinion? Probably not.

What will I do for Christmas 2008? I have no clue. A few minutes ago I began opening a bunch of boxes from Amazon.com. Sometimes I shop online for books, input my credit card number, and then have absolutely no recollection of what I ordered until the boxes arrive in my mailbox. Opening the boxes is fun. It must feel similar to what most people associate with Christmas: experiencing the joyful anticipation of unwrapping presents while surrounded by loving onlookers. My cats Larry and Lana love me, but were decidedly underwhelmed when I pulled out King of the Corner by Loren D. Estleman, Grave with an Ocean View by James M. Maloney, and some other selections a few minutes ago. They were hoping for food.

The photos above represent my drunken holiday celebration of 2006 with one Jewell Marceau. Maybe she and I can spend Christmas together again this year and record a few more holiday memories that we don't remember :)





***